IDS DBA Levity
Q: How many Oracle DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 17. Four to research the proper procedure in the manuals (it's different for every new version of the light bulb), one to change the bulb and twelve to retune the bulb and keep it from crashing afterward. Q: How many Informix DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? A: Just one, and if he's good at it, he can keep 200 other light bulbs lit 7/24/365 with only five minutes of downtime per year. Q: How many SQL-Server DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? A: That question may never be answered. Microsoft's recommended procedure is to reboot the old light bulb over and over again, until it starts working again. They're Microsoft. They can get away with it and no one will question it. Q: How many DB2 DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? A: Seven. Three to change the bulb and four marketing people to explain why that's better than having one Informix DBA change his light bulb. I just made these up. Anyone care to add to the collection? They needn't be light bulb jokes... --EEM
Everett Mills wrote: > Q: How many Oracle DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? > > A: 17. Four to research the proper procedure in the manuals (it's > different for every new version of the light bulb), one to change the > bulb and twelve to retune the bulb and keep it from crashing afterward. > > Q: How many Informix DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? > > A: Just one, and if he's good at it, he can keep 200 other light bulbs > lit 7/24/365 with only five minutes of downtime per year. > > Q: How many SQL-Server DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? > > A: That question may never be answered. Microsoft's recommended > procedure is to reboot the old light bulb over and over again, until it > starts working again. They're Microsoft. They can get away with it and > no one will question it. > > Q: How many DB2 DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? > > A: Seven. Three to change the bulb and four marketing people to explain > why that's better than having one Informix DBA change his light bulb. > > I just made these up. Anyone care to add to the collection? They > needn't be light bulb jokes... > > --EEM No wonder there are so many light bulb changers learning Oracle. <g> -- Daniel A. Morgan University of Washington damorgan@x.washington.edu (replace x with u to respond) Puget Sound Oracle Users Group www.psoug.org
On Mon, 04 Jun 2007 08:28:42 -0700, DA Morgan <damorgan@psoug.org> wrote: >Everett Mills wrote: >> Q: How many Oracle DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? >> >> A: 17. Four to research the proper procedure in the manuals (it's >> different for every new version of the light bulb), one to change the >> bulb and twelve to retune the bulb and keep it from crashing afterward. >> >> Q: How many Informix DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? >> >> A: Just one, and if he's good at it, he can keep 200 other light bulbs >> lit 7/24/365 with only five minutes of downtime per year. >> >> Q: How many SQL-Server DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? >> >> A: That question may never be answered. Microsoft's recommended >> procedure is to reboot the old light bulb over and over again, until it >> starts working again. They're Microsoft. They can get away with it and >> no one will question it. >> >> Q: How many DB2 DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? >> >> A: Seven. Three to change the bulb and four marketing people to explain >> why that's better than having one Informix DBA change his light bulb. >> >> I just made these up. Anyone care to add to the collection? They >> needn't be light bulb jokes... >> >> --EEM > >No wonder there are so many light bulb changers learning Oracle. <g> Misery loves company . . . .8-) JWC
[SNIP >Everett Mills wrote: > > Q: How many Oracle DBAs does it take to change a light bulb? > > > > A: 17. Four to research the proper procedure in the manuals (it's > > different for every new version of the light bulb), one to change the > > bulb and twelve to retune the bulb and keep it from crashing afterward. > >No wonder there are so many light bulb changers learning Oracle. <g> Yes, thats right. And the reason for so many oracle jobs is that there is a high level of churn. Once the customer / employeer finds out that they don't know anything more than how to change a light bulb, they move on to the next account... Always glorifying their resumes... ;-) _________________________________________________________________ Get a preview of Live Earth, the hottest event this summer - only on MSN http://liveearth.msn.com?source=msntaglineliveearthhm