Re: US-CA-OC ***FINITE PROGRAMMER/ANALYSTS***

VOLT Technical Group wrote: You'll get a shock out of this job: > > Finite Programmer/Analyst Yes, you must be limited, well constrained and bounded in your programming and analytical skills. Infinite programmers need not apply. We can only handle a limited number of you anyways. > We are looking for a candidate with FORTRAN programming experience for > Rigid Body Dynamics Analysis in addition too: Experience working in Morgues. A firm grasp of hard things. The ability to write a critical description in FORTRAN of the movement of hard bodies in the throes of passion. > ' Finite analysis experience is most important. Meaning, your limited understanding is OK. > ' Fortran, Win'95/Office'95/'97, spreadsheets, to generating reports. Is that a sentence? > ' Qualified candidates will demonstrate exceptional verbal and > especially written skills for you will be documenting software. No not that! Documenting software? Do people really do that? But you Vill document ze softvare. Und ve haf wais uv making you document ze softvare. > ' This company is in charge of developing computerized Rocket & > Satellite Parachute Recovery Systems with Airbags. Airbags will never function as computerized rockets. What are they thinking? Perhaps these people need to "demonstrate exceptional verbal and written skills" because they will be writing advertisements in English for people like me to read in newsgroups.